[Brian Allgar]

I propose this thread for comments on any item of news that takes your fancy. Here's mine:

(A country music singer wanted on a drink driving charge has been shot and killed in a gunfight with a bounty hunter sent to detain him, authorities have said.)

Well, the bounty man comes steppin’ where he didn’t oughter should
So I pull my trusty weapon, but it never done no good,
‘Cos he pops me in the vitals, that ol’ bounty-huntin’ runt - he
Done ended my recitals as a drinkin’, drivin’ count---

[Nicholas Stone]

http://www.spectator.co.uk/features/...d-on-waterloo/

Bien sûr we won the battle!
We never face defeat:
No enemy could ever match
The speed of our retreat!

[RCL]

No point in letting this request languish on Labor Day (US)

Epigrams for Labor Day

Some fail to see entitlements
are public workers’ investments.

You have to hand it to the Right,
which rarely rhymes with what is right.

Some suck the tits they claim to hate
while they berate the Nanny State.

Wisconsin had great higher-education
until a drop-out ruled for its extinction.

[Douglas G. Brown]

"Hillary Clinton to Show More Humor and Heart, Aides Say" NY Times, Sept 7, 2015

Sillery, chillery,
Candidate Hillary
Cranks up the warmth as her
Numbers go south;

Never a hot number,
Cool as a cucumber,
Oleomargarine
Froze in her mouth.

[Ann Drysdale]

Froze in her mouth?

[Jerome Betts]

Two Records Tumble

Let Merseyside get moist and moony
Now that it's fifty goals for Rooney
While others note, with quiet euphoria,
Our Liz has outscored Queen Victoria!

J.B. pp. C.A.D

[Erik Olson]

aa.aaaMy Trumpmare

To fill his ear; when, contrary, he hears...
A dismal universal hiss, the sound
Of public scorn... Milton Paradise Lost

In my nightmare, this outcome haunted
Me: that a Trump got what he wanted.
Voluble non-sense barked, uncouth,
Beat politics' sugar-coated truth.
The rubber face of this buffoon
Took flight: bombastic red balloon
Without a pilot to direct,
Yet made our State his private wreck.
Markets fell steep, news ratings soared;
Though all were losers, none were bored.

.

[Ann Drysdale]

Psst - Erik - "bored" rather than "board"? But anyway, a rollicking read.

[Erik Olson]

Thank you, Ann, and for kindly pointing out my typo, my tired eyes at the late hour of posting would probably not have noticed otherwise.
-Erik

[RCL]

Eric, a horror story! But some of us are bored by the bumbler.

Quick Impressions

Duh Bites

Fiorina was fierce
Trump a rump
Bush a bumbler
Kasich kick-ass
Rubio retro
Christie crusty
Cruz crazed
Huckabee weary
Paul peeved
Carson canny
Pataki plucky
Walker weirder
Santorum seedy
Jindal jumpy
Graham grim
Gilmore no more