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  #11  
Unread 02-13-2021, 04:50 AM
David Callin David Callin is offline
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Greetings to you too, Matthew.

I have no firm views either way on italics, but I quite like what you've done with them there. Will mull.

And I shall rethink the privy. Cradled in darkness is, perhaps, a little too much.

Thank you!

David
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  #12  
Unread 02-13-2021, 11:59 AM
James Brancheau James Brancheau is offline
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Nah, you should for sure keep the order the same. My only other probably horrible piece of advice might be to drop difficult from the title. If it was a difficult birth, I'd still wonder if the title's doing it justice. What it's worth, and it's a very good poem- happy to see your work here again.
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  #13  
Unread 02-14-2021, 07:05 AM
David Callin David Callin is offline
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Great. Thanks James. The title is, I admit, one that may have come to me too quickly. I'll have a think about a better one.

Cheers

David
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