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Unread 12-18-2019, 01:53 PM
Nicholas Stone's Avatar
Nicholas Stone Nicholas Stone is offline
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Default Gilbertian Election Pastiches

Old John was one of the few people on this site who would have enjoyed last week's election. Thinking about what he would have made of it I was struck by a Gilbertian possibility. Needless to say he'd have done it better.

Air: Henceforth, Strephon, cast away

Classic Dom Cummings, with magic wand:
Henceforth, Boris, cast away
Letwin, Grieve and Anna Soub-rey,
Sandbach, Gauke and John Bercow:
Into Government you shall go!

Chorus of Voters:
Into Government he shall go!
Backed by our supreme authority,
He'll command a large majority!
Into Government, Government, Government,
Into Government he shall go,
Into Government he shall go!

Classic Dom:
Now Blyth Valley votes for you,
Grimsby, Bishop Auckland too,
Bassetlaw and Clwyd also:
Into Government you shall go!

Chorus:
Into Government he shall go!
Backed by our Brexitious polity
He'll command a HUGE MAJORITY!
Into Government, G-O-overment,
G-O-V Government he shall go,
Into Government HE SHALL GO.
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  #2  
Unread 12-19-2019, 12:58 AM
Ann Drysdale's Avatar
Ann Drysdale Ann Drysdale is offline
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I enjoyed that, Nico.

I shall attempt a riposte, but it's sad to think that by this time John would have been trotting them out in double figures.
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Unread 12-19-2019, 12:42 PM
Adrian Fry Adrian Fry is offline
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I love 'Brexitous polity'. Delicious!
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  #4  
Unread 12-20-2019, 04:33 AM
Ann Drysdale's Avatar
Ann Drysdale Ann Drysdale is offline
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Here is my promised contribution, Nico. I think it sings OK, though I have just put the fear of God up the postman who overheard my efforts by accident.

Chanukkah Sameach to you and your family.


[YUM-YUM]

Here's a how-de-do!
We have voted to
End our European status
As a secular afflatus
Turns our passports blue
What are we to do?
What are we to do?

[NANKI-POO]

Here's a pretty mess!
In a month, or less
We may leave with no deal mooted
Summarily executed
Crowing nonetheless.
What high-handedness!
What high-handedness!

[KO-KO]
Here's a state of things
To the past she clings!
A majority decision
Seems to be outwith her vision
When it Brexit brings
What a state of things!
What a state of things!


[YUM-YUM & NANKI-POO]

With a passion that's intense
I wish it were not so
All the laws of common sense
Support my cause, I know
If Boris' plan is true
T’is mad to carry through!
Here's a pretty state of things!
Here's a pretty how-de-do!
Here's a pretty state of things!
A pretty state of things!

(Proceed to final ensemble/clusterfuck...)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C34pYhwLt0Q

(Added the above link. Merely corroborative detail, intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing pastiche...)
.

Last edited by Ann Drysdale; 12-21-2019 at 02:30 AM. Reason: a tweak and a link ...
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  #5  
Unread 12-26-2019, 06:25 AM
Nicholas Stone's Avatar
Nicholas Stone Nicholas Stone is offline
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Wonderful work Annie! I enjoyed singing it through too (minus postman). Many thanks for your good wishes, Merry Christmas to you and yours!

Thanks Adrian!
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