[Chris O'Carroll]

No 4229
Set by Leonora Casement
We asked for imaginative descriptions of the introduction of style changes to items of clothing of your choice: zip flies, trouser creases, turn-ups, and so on.

This week’s winners
Well done. A few of you misunderstood this comp and sent in descriptions of the birth of clothing fashions that haven’t been invented yet. An interesting idea, which we may use in the future! This week, the winners can have £20 each, with the Tesco vouchers going in addition to David Silverman.

Turn-ups
Edward VII, who was at the time prince of Wales, was having a new shooting suit tailored at our establishment, Greaves and Hawkes. Mr Smith, our senior tailor, unfortunately produced trousers that were two inches too long. Rather than admit his mistake and waste the material, he incorporated the excess as turn-ups. The prince was delighted by this novelty and reckoned that turn-ups would “catch any loose sovereigns that would otherwise fall to the ground”. He also commented on how useful they would be for “catching any loose pieces of fluff” – the pun was not lost upon Mr Smith! The innovation was an instant hit and added much to the Edwardian rakish appearance and behaviour. It quickly became de rigueur, demanded by rich and poor alike.
Sid Field

The short scarf
Fashion historians miss the significance of the scarf revolution of the 1990s – they’ve generally got it completely round their necks. Short scarves worn in a simple loop, now favoured by aspiring urban professionals, replaced two classic styles: the thick muffler that protected workers in the early mornings on their way to pithead, shipyard or steel plant; and the trip-over-it-if-you’re-not-careful, striped university wrap-around. Both were socialist: one accessorised the cloth cap (and was sometimes used selflessly to keep the whippet warm); the other was essential on left-wing demonstrations, along with the duffel coat. The modern style was conceived by consultants advising on the rebranding of New Labour, before becoming the wrap-up of choice of the bourgeoisie and poseurs everywhere. But if real winters return . . .
Derek Morgan

The zip fastener
I have this day been shewn a new Invention whose purpose is to facilitate the opening and closing of garments. The example took the form of a pair of Trousers; the familiar buttons, situated in the region of the Codpiece, had been replaced by a Device that had the appearance of two rows of gleaming Teeth. When opened, it bore an alarming resemblance to the gaping jaws of a juvenile Crocodile and I cannot doubt that closing it on the unruly or carelessly arranged male Member must have the same effect as would those reptilian Jaws. Who could wish to feel his Manhood lacerated by so fearsome an Instrument? It is my belief that this sinister Contraption will never be heard of again.
Alban Girral

Gloves with no fingers
For thousands of homesick, starving French soldiers, amid temperatures of -30 degrees, the winter of 1812 was a wretched experience. The Russians rubbed it in with cruel mind games, cheerfully waving their fingerless gloves, pointing at signposts proclaiming “Saint-Tropez, 3,275km” and playing songs evocative of the Auvergne on the accordion. The French exclamations of “Eh! Les gants!” were misconstrued by the Russians, who concluded that the gloves were considered the height of chic, Parisian fashion. The style was copied in high-class circles in St Petersburg , appeared in Anna Karenina and was even worn by the tsarina. After the revolution, it was denounced as decadent, then reappeared in what Muscovites called Glovenost. Now, the mistaken belief that fingerless gloves are a mark of good taste has finally reached the west.
David Silverman

The cravat
Croatian mercenaries of old wore a scarf or “cravat” into battle, which, in seconds, could be unknotted and ready for use as a garrotte. It was first introduced to the west when right-wing newspapers gave the cravat away free to readers, for use in punishing illegal immigrants, working mothers and inaccurate weather forecasters. Today, in Britain and parts of the US, it is a handy replacement for the necktie, something more socially acceptable than the open-necked shirt. It is no longer considered the workman’s choker but a middle-class (perhaps even pretentious) item of clothing, for many view the cravat as they once judged men’s suede shoes – rather effeminate.
Michael Birt

[Brian Allgar]

(Posted by mistake)