[Jayne Osborn]

John won't be a happy bunny (me neither) but it's a prose competition again this time. Never mind, let's have a go - we must be in it to win it! Over to all of you... I can't even get off the starting blocks at the moment.

Jayne


COMPETITION No 161
by Tessa Castro

Walking in the street seems to me an increasingly odd experience. Please supply an extract from the diary of Samuel Pepys recording his impressions
of life now. Maximum 150 words.

Entries to ‘Competition 161’ by post (The Oldie, 65 Newman Street, London W1T 3EG), email (comps@theoldie.co.uk) or fax (020 7436 8804) by 8th March 2013.

[Lance Levens]

In the morning at my iPad long enough to run through a Discovery Card and so to Starbuck's where I self-caffeinated till three o’clock and then to Mr. Singh. Swain was there and shewed us his tatoo on his eyelid. Thereupon, the others revealed tatoos in the most immodest places. While at Singh's we were by chance discoursing of Don Juan, the great womanizer, so that I was, I remember, ashamed to recall about my own misogynistic forays at Cambridge. Marduke was off to his polyamory group which convenes in Lincoln’s Inn Court. Asked if I could attend but they were buying of various erotica so I was fain to slip from there and went to Mrs. X's to be advised about a pilates/yoga coach to work with me, but she could think of none.

[John Whitworth]

Nice one Lance. I thought the word was spelt tattoo but I could well be wrong. And maybe Pepys spelt it that way.

[Lance Levens]

Thanks for your eagle orthographic eyes, John. Like your Joyce at Oxford.