[John Whitworth]

The first stanza is by Boris Johnson and is to be found in the article about him in The Wall Street Journal. He is referring to Gordon Brown.
The lineation and continuation is my own, referring (rather obviously) to a. a woman and b. a dog. Sphereans are encouraged to contribute. You have to stick to the metre obviously.

Bring it on
You great big quivering
Invertebrate gelatinous
Jelly of indecision.
Bring it on.

Cuddle up
You sweet soft murmuring
Congenial desirable
Paragon of perfection
Cuddle up

Put it down
You goddammed blithering
Detestable maleficent
Hellhound of Pandemonium
Put it down

[Cally Conan-Davies]

(To All Uriah Heaps, obviously!)

Suck it up
You puffed up whinging
Despicable malodorous
Lickspittle of victimology
Suck it up

[John Whitworth]

Victimology is new to me. I like it! John

[Rick Mullin]

(to a reflection in the mirror of nature)

Give it up,
you half-assed bollixing
unteachable preposterous
bucket of psychobabble.
Give it up.

[Janet Kenny]

Give it up
You pompous posturing
Inflatable ridiculous
Aper of erudition.
Give it up.

[Cally Conan-Davies]

Isn't this the most wonderful form for invective??!!

Totally Shakesperian.

I'm glad you started it, John!

And good ones, Rick and Janet! I want more!

Cally

[Mary Moore]

Spit it out
You mealy mouthed sap-sucker
Arrogant ass-kisser
Twisty-tongued turd taster
Spit it out

[Rick Mullin]

Oh - oh,

This is degenerating, like that telephone game. I may have started the process by hyphenating half-assed, which is supposed to be counted as two words. I think this deal is meant to be syllabic, thus:


1/ 1 / 1
1 / 1 / 1 / 3
4 / 4
2/ 1/4
1/1 /1 (repeat first line)

no?

[Mary Moore]

Rick, I had no idea we were talking syllabics since John's two examples wouldn't fit the model you've proposed.
Mary

[Rick Mullin]

Who said John's winning?~,:^)