[John Whitworth]

Well, here it is. It doesn't strictly have to be a poem, but we are poetry people, are we not?

No. 2577: Give me five
You are invited to supply definitions of five types of anything you choose. Walk? Kiss? Farewell? It’s up to you. Entries to ‘Competition 2577’ by 2 January or email lucy@spectator.co.uk.

Incidentaly, the results to that anagrammatic thing are in this week's issue. I have saved this amazing effort for you. It is an anagram of the first stanza of Larkin's 'Aubade'. Sheer genius!

Aubade

Wife or husband: both will drop,
Quiet, day or night —
Everything will rant, screw, stop,
End: you will feel its bite.

Then, aren’t we a mess,
Unmanned, torn? Wait:
Chum, try and undress.
We’re late.

Desires? Seen the clock?
Sssh: noises bang,
Bang true: that’s it: and tock! —
The fever warns: Go hang.

I hate to say it, son, but death
Will geld you in the end:
Hitched or not, it’s lack of breath
Will annul all sense, my friend.

Bill Greenwell

[peterjb]

DACTYLS

Fumbly-thumbly,
off to the side from the
four that oppose it in
primates and men:
up means a yes, while a
gladiatorial
down meant you fought but you
wouldn’t again.

Jointerly pointerly,
porer, indicter and
picker and chooser of
("Yes, we want YOU!"),
wind-speed assessor and
(superadaptable)
shssher and triggerer,
what can’t it do?

Middling-diddling,
this one is frequently
given in anger to
motoring berks,
those who cut in on you
anal-retentively —
give them the middle and
watch how it works.

Ring-a-ding-ding-erly,
why is it this one that’s
chosen to signify
somebody’s hitched —
till it instead wears a
postmatrimonial
circle of white once the
spouse has been ditched?

Minimus-schinimus,
toffee-nosed tea-drinkers
see its deployment as
quite de rigueur;
call it ridiculous
ultrapretentiousness
over their pinkies, and
I will concur.



[This message has been edited by peterjb (edited December 19, 2008).]

[Susan McLean]

Tour de force, Peter.

Susan

[Janet Kenny]

Like Susan said Peter.

[Martin Elster]

Like Susan and Janet said. Really clever.

[FOsen]

Tactile Dactyls - very deft!

Frank

[David Anthony]

Enter it, Peter.
They will like it.

[Jim Hayes]

Oh these are very good indeed.
Jim

[Janice D. Soderling]

How tiresome you must find all this agreement, Peter, but count me in on the group think.

[peterjb]

Sorry, that was a drive-by DD shooting, and I've only now returned to the crime scene. Thanks for the encouragement. I'll send it in.