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Unread 04-03-2009, 10:27 PM
Wendy Sloan Wendy Sloan is offline
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Location: New York, N.Y. USA
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It is a moving, dramatic & effective story.
I was confused the first time through, but on second read it seemed perfectly clear. I don't know if the poem needs smoothing or revision ... or if it's just one of those poems that has to be read more than once ...

The story's told by the wife: her husband ("you") used to slip his father (the subway worker who'd come home tired and drunk and crash) a nickle. The extreme reserve of this father/son relationship is briefly sketched in a few words -- "all you knew of touch" -- and the fact, noted, that the father never said anything about his son's act. Now, coffin-side, the wife is repeating the story as the two of them say goodbye to the father by slipping a subway token into his"cosmetic" (i.e., prepared by the undertaker) hand.

A lot is said in a few words here. And there's a turn -- from relating the husband's childhood act of leaving the nickle in his father's hand, to the present coffin-side gesture the husband & wife have hit upon.

Very original.

N can relate the story so vividly because ... being a poet, she's able to use her imagination!

Last edited by Wendy Sloan; 04-03-2009 at 10:33 PM.
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