[Martin Elster]

Does anyone know who won the 'RecessionConfession' contest?

[John Whitworth]

There were four winners but none of us made it. Since 'The Oldie' is not on the web you have to buy it to know. But fear not. I will keep you up to date. I thought some of ours were better than any of theirs, but that's the way it goes with competitions. I would print the winner but it's a bit of a sweat. His name is Peter Davies.

[Martin Elster]

Originally Posted by John Whitworth

There were four winners but none of us made it. Since 'The Oldie' is not on the web you have to buy it to know. But fear not. I will keep you up to date. I thought some of ours were better than any of theirs, but that's the way it goes with competitions. I would print the winner but it's a bit of a sweat. His name is Peter Davies.

Thanks, John. I thought some of ours were pretty damn good.

[Janet Kenny]

Thanks John,
It's who you know she lied glibly.

Ours were terrific.
Janet

[Jim Hayes]

My favorite is 15-8 on.
Although that's maybe when the race begins.

[R. S. Gwynn]

Recession Confession (1958)

When I was young I stuck my tongue out sometimes at my Dad
Because he'd say, "Back in my day we really had it bad.
I'd work full-time to earn a dime, and put it in the bank.
Kids now just spend and so they'll end up one day in the tank."

And then I'd wake at dawn's first break to hear the rattling cash
He tried to shake from my own stake, my private little stash,
The bank that he had given me, a sailor-man of brass.
His voice was strange: "I just need change for coffee and some gas."

So when I'd go to check my dough I'd take my hollow man
And shake him ‘round to hear a sound like dry leaves in a can.
I had to see and used the key I'd hidden with my shoes,
And out would fall the scraps of all my Daddy's I. O. U.'s.

I'm not dismayed; he always paid me back, eventually,
Redeem his notes and watch stock-quotes. I never asked a fee
For what he took, but now I look to feather my own nest.
I should have said, "Just take it, Dad, but I CHARGE INTEREST!"

[Jim Hayes]

It's topping but I just wonder how it would be if it ended on a more rueful note- building up to How much I'd have if I'd charged interest?
Just a thought.

[Janet Kenny]

Recession Confession


The worst of times the best of times!
Despite the credit crunch,
Largesse will camouflage our crimes
And take us out to lunch.

Our monetarist Friedman creed
Will bend to Keynesian gales.
With modesty we drink to Greed
And tip the bathroom scales.

We smug fat cats sit on the mat
As assets stripped reveal
We still retain our habitat.
It is our pain you feel.

Calloo calay we take our pay
And spend your money too.
They bail us out so we can say
We did it all for you.



[This message has been edited by Janet Kenny (edited November 23, 2008).]

[Julie Steiner]

This one is probably too dated for such a late deadline, and over 16 lines--maybe I should ax the first stanza. Anyway, here's my effort:

[Relineated into 12 lines, per John's suggestion below. Plus a few other tweaks. Thanks, John!]

The flowers are dead. The leaves have fled. All colors have forgotten us
But red and green. The Yuletide scene each year grows more monotonous.
But wait! What's that? A bold éclat of neon Astrobrite!
A GOING OUT OF BUSINESS banner! What a welcome sight!

The shops' displays for holidays have bothered me each year.
Their mercenary making-merry seemed so insincere.
But this year, see how honestly they're drooling for my dough?
They're GOING OUT OF BUSINESS now, and EVERYTHING MUST GO!

Now churchy types can cease their gripes at neutral SEASON'S GREETINGS;
The pew-averse won't have to curse those MERRY CHRISTMAS sheetings.
Now no one whines at storefront signs' divisive words of peace!
Ah, GOING OUT OF BUSINESS! And the hopeful phrase FOR LEASE!

Julie Stoner



[This message has been edited by Julie Stoner (edited November 24, 2008).]

[John Whitworth]

I think that is jolly good, Julie and you can always relineate in in very long lines. I'd hate to cut any of it. Give it a go.